Our little Miranda is one week old as of me typing this (you’ll read this tomorrow morning). At this moment, I’ll have heard her cry at this point from somewhere beyond a blue curtain. I am shaking because it’s cold and there is a room of people that I can’t quite see. I’ve closed my eyes because I’m not sure what I should be looking at and block out everything when I hear that cry. It’s hardly a cry though. I can hear this voice and I know it’s her. Everyone sounds happy and I still can’t see her. I think Matt has ran around with the camera in the room to start taking pictures. I’m still shaking. But a calm has come over me because she’s healthy. She’s okay. After a day of everything going the opposite of what I thought would happen, we ended up with a beautiful healthy girl.
I don’t know the amount of time that has passed before I get to glance at her. I don’t even see the nurse holding her, all I see is her. A beautiful little girl. I know every mom thinks their baby is beautiful at birth and most are scrunchy, funny looking things, but I couldn’t think anything else. My first words to her were how beautiful she was. My second were to the room asking if she was physically okay. I couldn’t see her because she was wrapped already. A voice said yes and she was whisked away. I’m not sure when Matt took the photo of us (that I love so much).
My world changed a week ago today. Nothing is the same and that is great. This past week has had high and lows that I’ve never experienced. The great part is that there is so much more to come.
Here are some highlights of my first week with Pumpkin:
- I learned to hold a newborn.
- That a smile, even a gas smile, is the greatest thing at 3:30am.
- To be patient and believe in myself. I can only do what I think is best for pumpkin.
- That I would hold in wonder every new expression. Particularly when you are looking around the room trying to learn your environment.
- Spending this week with DH and Pumpkin has been amazing. The three of us holding her, reading to her, and just working as a team has moved our relationship to another level. (this is not to say I haven’t had my emotional breakdowns btw. But DH has been working through them with me. Again Team.).
- That I can tell by pumpkin’s breathing and sighing if she’s ready to be up or is just moving around.
It’s been a great week Pumpkin and DH and I are ready for the rest of the adventure.