The first day of Spring was a whirlwind for us. I woke up spotting, but had no idea why. I had just finished my period two weeks before. I took an ovulation test to see if I was ovulating and it was bright, deep red. Since I’m a POAS-er (Pee on a stick), I had a pregnancy test around and took it. To my complete shock, there were two dark lines. I was pregnant! I showed hubby and we were both shocked. The odd thing was how dark the second line was.
Pumpkin was sick, but we started to get her ready for the day. Then she puked on us. So we went into cleaning mode and after that was clean, she puked on us again. I looked at hubby and was like is this how we’re really going to start our family of four? We laughed because it seemed like the most ridiculous day ever but a good story when baby is born.
Unfortunately that won’t happen because Thursday I had surgery for an ectopic pregnancy.
I had to find a new OB because my old one doesn’t take any insurance anymore. I called two OBs. One would see me right away and start with blood draws. You get this number called a beta and if it’s doubling, then the pregnancy is growing. The other OB wouldn’t see me for another 8-10 weeks (May 1st). The justification is “If you are going to miscarry, there is nothing they can do” so they don’t see you until almost out of the first trimester.
I had four beta numbers:
March 19 – 2197
March 21 – 3334
March 25- 6179
March 30 – 9577
This showed positive growth and at Thursday’s ultrasound appointment we were positive we’d see a sac and maybe even a little egg. But during the ultrasound he found that my uterus was empty. Dr showed us my tubes and pointed out that he thought the egg was in the left fallopian tube and needed to come out. He would use a scope to see where the egg was in the tube. The optimistic surgery would be to just slice in the tube and get the egg out.
It was 11:30am and my surgery was set for 1:30pm. It seemed unfair that my blood was taken by a tech who was about 6 months pregnant. The nurses tried to make me feel better by telling their personal stories. I smiled and really only cried when they started to wheel me into the operating room and I said goodbye to Matt. My nerves were shot.
I met the OR Staff and we spoke about video games while I sucked in some oxygen. My last words before going under were about how I sucked at Call of Duty and that I missed playing video games.
I woke up in the curtained off healing area. The nurse was kind and upped my pain meds accordingly. She explained that my left tube had ruptured and that I had been bleeding internally, so they had to remove the tube along with the egg. Not only was I part of the 1% that experience an ectopic pregnancy, but I was also one of the 1 in 5 women that never feel any pain, or have any symptoms of an ectopic pregnancy. I had no physical signs that any of this was happening.
The hardest thing to wrap my head around is that at 9am we thought we were going to get a first glimpse at our baby. By 4pm, I was laying in a hospital bed healing from a surgery that probably saved my life.
Physically, I’m healing very slowly and the next few posts will probably be on how I’m dealing with this emotionally. I can say that there are aspects of all of this that make me mad and other moments that make me sad. They said the hormone swings are going to make me feel and act a bit crazy. I’m just going to allow myself to feel it all. Hopefully this will help anyone else going through this.